I AM BMR!!!
I do stand-up comedy.
Stand-up comedy! It's something special isn't it? What do you have besides your wit and material?
The microphone (plugged in if you're lucky)?
The lights (or the all-consuming darkness, much like in your soul)?
A bag full of guitars, wigs, luchador masks, puppets, fruit, boxing gloves, slide whistles, harmonicas and other nonsense (if you're me, BMR!)?
Besides those, it's really just you sharing something from deep inside you with a roomful of strangers.
Stand-up comedy really IS art isn't it?
NAW! it's a toilet! Exactly! You already knew that. In your heart and in your head, you KNEW that!
Art is paintings and sculptures and, like, tapestries and that. Not just somebody talking at other people. What even IS that?! Not art, say I!
And I'm qualified to decide that because I have a Bachelor of the Arts degree from ten years ago from Paisley Uni.
Here's a handy diagram to help you:
And stand-up had no chance of being art.
ESPECIALLY with me doing it, with my props and shouting and running around. Stand-up has had NO chance at all of being considered art...
See, I'm classing things up a bit. Putting a bit of REAL art into my comedy show. Making an "exhibition" of myself, if you will. HA! That's an art joke for the really smart people, don't feel too bad if you didn't get it but the show will probably be full of classy crap like that.
See, I've been doing REAL art lately, that's how I know stand-up isn't it. I've been immersing myself deep into the world of creating art and I've made a show about it.
This is what I make now.
THIS is ART!
LOOK AT IT! That's DEATH ON A MOTORCYCLE! Were you ready for that?
NO ONE is EVER ready for that! Exactly! It's like a metaphor for the fact that none of us can escape our fate. Unless we have a more badass motorcycle.
NO ONE has a more badass motorcycle than Death.
See, art makes you think.
If this is the kind of stuff I'm showing in advance, just IMAGINE what my show, BMRtist, is going to be like! Can you imagine what else Death could be riding?!
Like your mu...
NO! Too easy. NOT ART!
Fight your instincts BMR! You're an ARTIST now.
So, yeah, if you want to see some REAL art, I'll see you at McPhabbs for BMRtist. 8pm, Friday 24th March.
And here's a hot tip. You better buy your tickets now, because it'll probably sell out once the art world gets wind of it.
This show could set the art world on fire so get your tickets now and hopefully I can set YOU on fire instead.
Catch BMR: BMRtist @ McPhabbs on Friday 24th March. Get your tickets HERE!